Life is a climb, but the view is great. 

I took those words to heart the first time I heard them.

Every step in that incredible journey gives you something to savor, something to store in your memory as a mark of that step.

Like a river flowing into the ocean, you take with you everything you find on the way, tweaking some things to suit your purpose, but always remembering.

When I was little (all of us really) , I often had my elders advising me to stay away from certain things.

Bottle up your anger.

Rein in your pride.

Don’t ever be lazy.

Naturally, when I grew up I thought it was horrid that I felt lazy or angry at times, and as I was advised, I tried to bottle it up all the way.

Only when I tried to bottle it up, did I understand what it really was.

It was a river, and it refused to be contained in something as meager as a bottle I had. It demanded its right to flow into the ocean, to become part of the whole.

How could I let it be part of the whole? It would destroy me if I did.

In the end however, I did.

I took pride when I did something right. When I had to make a tough choice once again, I would remember the joy I felt the time I did right.

I lusted for the best version of myself. She was confident, bold and brave, and the only person who could be her was me.

So, I let my greed for my true potential push my boundaries. I let it take me to new places and experiences, to people and ideas. 

I was gluttonous when I found myself facing experiences that could only be called divine. I drank it in, all of it, and found that I wanted more.

My envy for that happy girl I was made me explore and observe, try to learn all I could so I could face those moments once again. To truly deserve them. 

So that whenever I felt angry, I would remind myself that wouldn’t take me any closer to where I wished to be. I would turn those fires of wrath into heat for my dreams, so they could hatch.

And when the end of the day was near, I let sloth take over me. I would see the world, watch its people and let myself breathe. 

Because sometimes I learned best when I was doing nothing – only seeing, hearing and feeling.

The water of the ocean is salty, but only because it welcomes every river that flows towards it. It is rich with variety that no other body of water could boast of because of its inclusiveness.

And in some way or the other, every body of water is one with the ocean, and the ocean couldn’t exist without them.

Accept your weaknesses. 

Try not to fight them or bottle them up, because they would only gain strength against the barriers and break it down.

Channel them instead. Let them flow where you want it to flow, so that they become rungs to the ladder that you wish to climb.

Let them lead you up and not pull you down, for whichever feeling you may have is but a tool in the hands of the Power that is You.

 

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11 thoughts on “Sins and Ladders

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